Personality:Spoilers for the end of Homestuck may be within. Dirk Strider can be viewed as an enigmatic person, almost intentionally so. Nobody would know at a glance that he's an intelligent person who loves deeply that can be an insufferable jackass, a huge dork and some kind of action hero depending on what's going on. His weapon is something that's repeatedly stated a being "unbreakable." Dirk is unyielding and seemingly unbreakable himself, like he's made of steel. He's outwardly so aloof that people would never know all of who he is by looking at him. Even people who know him best had still needed to put him together like a puzzle.
He knows he's cool. He doesn't pretend to be. He thinks he is to the point of having bragging rights about it. He thinks he's basically Batman, highly intelligent and badass. He has absurd hobbies and interests but he owns that he likes what he likes and can have people questioning if there's so many layers of irony that he made something horribly stupid cool. He has a lot of confidence when it comes to most of his abilities. He's a perfectionist and an overachiever, putting far more than 100% into everything he does. He sets the bar ridiculously high for himself and everyone around him, without thinking for a second it's unreachable until much later.
Nothing about Dirk Strider is "half-assed." One can count on him to put a lot of thought and effort into everything. He's either an unstoppable force or a complete disaster, sabotaging himself without knowing how to stop because he has to keep trying to perfect it. Very rarely is there an in-between. The most common middle-ground he's capable of is zoning out completely. He gets utterly distracted while trying to do everything at once and always ends up zoning out on one end to focus on the other. Despite claims and attempts to do so, he's not great at multi-tasking.
It's stated that Dirk has a usual way of getting exactly what he wants. He believes it's expected of him to do it all so he can be controlling and pushy. His method of doing things starts out as being viewed as the best possible method by himself, even if it can be completely insane to the normal person. For example, when teaching one how to fight, he assumes the best method of doing so is ambushing them and relentlessly beating the crap out of them until they land a hit back. His method of teaching someone how to ride a bike would be to put them on the bike and then forcefully shove them down a large hill.
His controlling can turn into playing mind games that border on manipulative. Putting his Auto-Responder on with Jake in order to keep him toes and insisting things are good when questioned. He assumes he is the one in control. He thinks of himself as a puppeteer, in every sense of the word (Holy SHIT does he love puppets). He grew up with puppets and robots both of which he himself are responsible for creating and have never refused an idea from him. The only exception to the rule is The Auto-Responder, who he still assumes to be predictable enough for a long time. Jane is given the title of leader but he assumes he is going to be the one pulling the strings in the background. He doesn't ask if they're okay with his plans or even sharing the details before enacting them. He phrases things as opinions to be considered but they are meant to nudge people into the direction he wants them to go. He assumes he knows what's best for people, knows what they need and where they need to improve. He likes to give his friends advice to aid their personal development by pointing out their flaws and explaining how to fix them, like telling Jake to be more skeptical and telling Jane to be less so.
His friends often have no idea what to make of his actions, assuming it might be part of some grand convoluted scheme they know they can't win. People don't know how to talk to him directly because figuring him out is a challenge. Roxy and Jake both express a fear of failing him, of telling him what they really think. People have a hard time saying 'No.' It's never his intention to be this way.
Dirk has a huge heart. He loves almost unconditionally. He honestly thinks he's being helpful until it becomes clear he's not. His habit of pushing his friends stems from wanting to witness them to succeed. He never gives the thought of day that they're incapable of doing so. He believes in them completely and holds the utmost respect for them, Roxy especially so. He thinks she is far stronger than he'll ever be. He sees her as the only one capable of overcoming her own flaws and the main glue that keeps them (him) together. He feels guilty his love is strictly platonic because he just wants to make her happy. Dirk confesses doesn't think he could ever actually intentionally cause her harm - which would undoubtedly carry over to any of his friends. He can't raise his sword to them, even if it he knew it they would be perfectly fine and it would result in their advancement. He wouldn't want to raise a hand to them either. He even hesitates to destroy his own creations or throw a lifeless puppet away. The thought of having to intentionally hurt terrifies him. He'd rather sacrifice himself than have someone/thing he cares about face pain. In a doomed timeline (resulting from [S] Game Over), realizing his friends are dead and he ultimately failed to do anything about it is the one thing that causes him to completely give up, too overcome with grief. He'd hate to be alone again.
He was alone for sixteen years. Dirk grew up in the middle of a flooded wasteland. The world had been a chaotic environment he could never venture out into. He managed to raise himself somehow. He had to be active and know how to take initiative because the other option was perishing. Without a human culture to dictate the norm, he picks it apart from the past, choosing to emulate the long-dead figure of his "Bro" (His universe's Dave) as much as he can. He's built up the legend in his head. This is his idol, the legacy of which he wishes to live up to and improve upon. He believes having this positive figure helped him become a better person than he would have been otherwise and set the standard for who he wanted to be. Being the overachiever that he is, he takes ironic gestures like interpreted acts of extreme masculinity displayed in archived data about this guy to an extreme. He's hyper-intelligent gay man with but refuses to make his orientation anything more than a footnote in order to act in loving mockery of a bro culture that existed centuries before him. The performance, as he words it, is difficult to break. He's been doing it his entire life. This wall of dudebro irony and stoic expression helps him control his world. It allows him to fit in better with Jake and Jane, who exist at the same time as his idol and don't understand his situation until it's explained to them later on. It also limits how visible his true thoughts and feelings are should he be monitored by the evil alien overlord while simultaneously honoring someone who dedicated his life to giving her a middle finger.
Dirk's only social contact for his time alone had been with people over the internet (only one of which exists in the same time frame and two of which are aliens sharing a body.) After starting the game, he's had a few months with fellow humans. This lack of contact along with his self-imposed emulation of his idol and a constant threat to their lives looming over, have reasonably lead to Dirk having difficulty properly expressing himself and knowing how to act around people. He fails spectacularly at making his first relationship anything but an emotionally draining one for Jake, not initially getting why they shouldn't spend every waking second together among many other issues.
It's joked by his friends that he could be an emotionless robot. He's had to put aside expressing things in order to protect himself and to focus on what needs to be done. Emotions can get in the way of thinking clearly and he thinks a lot. Any displays of affection are extremely difficult to express, even if it's with the person he spent his entire life protecting while she was sleep-floating in their dreams or an actual boyfriend. He won't tell someone how deeply he cares for them outright unless pushed to an extreme, choosing instead of convey it in a way that seems like he's joking or sharing the thought with someone else. He wants people to know what he's thinking and feeling, expects them to see through any ironic or subtle gesture but his cool composure doesn't falter enough to clue people most of the time unless he outright says what's on his mind. He's more or less emotionally unbreakable, like a really disciplined Vulcan. The walls remain firmly up and in place. This is true even while under the influence of Trickster Mode, something that alters inhibitions and has his friends loudly expressing thoughts and desires to eerie smiling extremes claiming it will solve their problems. He's terrified and yells at them but remains visually deadpanned under the influence himself and in control.
Dirk can often play the straight man (pun not intended) to his friends. His reactions to antics can be the equivalent of looking into the camera like he's on The Office. This does not mean he is not occasionally downright ridiculous himself. He's an intellectual and uses endless sarcasm, which displays at times as being an insufferable know-it-all. This is much like Rose Lalonde, technically his daughter, who Roxy comments directly to with "You're Dirk!" upon hearing her speak. He shares a verbose analytical way of talking to people and a habit of getting too long-winded with his writings. There's a similar sense of snarky humors, while he's still capable of going off on tangents and using inappropriate metaphors like Dave. He can be both very terse and very wordy depending on who he's talking to and the current comfort level. This can be demonstrated best while talking to Jake and Jane who have respectively been on the receiving end of getting blunt one-word replies laced with sarcasm and paragraphs of rambling filled with pop-culture and literary references. He's completely game for humorous fun, should nothing to too serious be happening. For instance, Dirk indulges Caliborn's request that he draw smut and the drawings end up including Jake eating a baby and Roxy comparing breasts to an ocean.
While he does act upon the art-form of 'irony,' there is sincerity in every action and he does know when to turn it off and get serious. He's willing to admit when things aren't as perfect as he wants them to be when deemed necessary, even in cases where he might justify the problems later. Dirk doesn't shy away from deep conversation. He goes the deepest when speaking to Jane and later on Dave, people who he feels the most comfortable with. He's completely upfront with Jane right from the start, the conversations being the most telling. He thinks she gets him the most. In a lesser instance, Calliope gets to see past the ironic facade because he goes to her for advice concerning things about the game. He is willing to share and offer genuine opinions, express fears and general thoughts and, perhaps most importantly, listen in order to offer support.
Growing up alone, Dirk has been with his own thoughts for a long time. He is also surrounded by versions of himself, constantly requiring him to look in the mirror and see his own flaws. He externalizes to the point where he often feels he is an outsider looking at himself. After finally being able to interact with people, he becomes more self-aware. He can witness his interactions with people. He does not believe himself to be a good person and is in a constant struggle to avoid being a worse one. His own worst enemy is himself, metaphorically and literally. This is made abundantly clear with how to reacts to the Auto Responder, an artificial intelligence that started out as a copy of his thirteen-year-old self's brain. Dirk allows him to pretend to be him and talk to his friends until he realizes his behavior is something he doesn't like, which of course, the AR points out is the same behavior Dirk would be having in the same situation. The AR is rude to him and he does it back because this is how he thinks he should be treated on a level.
His low opinions of himself leads to a distrust in others, at least when expressing opinions about him. He fears that sharing his deep respect and love would overwhelm Roxy, when in actuality it would be the other way around. It would overwhelm him to hear praise. Compliments may be dismissed because is not reaching his own personal standards and doesn't like what he sees. He thinks he knows best and what he knows is the he's the worst. He holds remorse for everything he does and everything every version of him does. While he owns up to what he does and says, he isn't sure how to approach fixing problematic areas without an act of self-destruction. He almost destroys AR but can't bring himself to do it.
He puts himself under a lot of stress. Dirk stated he does not sleep, trying to be alert at all times. He likely doesn't sleep much once he lacks a dream-self that allows a constant state of being awake. His life required him to be on guard and never learned how not to be. He more or less skipped childhood and assumed he had to take the position of main protector for the group like he had always been for himself. He idealizes his friends and genuinely feels he has to help them. This is the role he thinks he is best at and doesn't know what other purpose he might serve for them outside of it. He doesn't want anyone to see him fail because failure would mean a loss of purpose and thus a loss of self. The complete loss of control is the worst fear for him so he does what he can to keep it and remain functional. He keeps trying even if things are completely out of his hands. Dirk can't back down completely lest he completely shatter to pieces.
He's getting better at picking pieces back up. Very slowly. It starts with Dave, someone who isn't his idol but he thinks might be even better. Dirk gave up control for once and stopped being unbreakable.
dirk strider | homestuck | no reserve 1/2
Name: Jackie
Personal Journal:
AIM/Plurk/Etc.:
Timezone: EST
Current Characters in Route: N/A
Character
Name: Dirk Strider
Series: Homestuck
Timeline: [S] Act 7
Canon Resource Links: Wiki entry.
Personality: Spoilers for the end of Homestuck may be within.
Dirk Strider can be viewed as an enigmatic person, almost intentionally so. Nobody would know at a glance that he's an intelligent person who loves deeply that can be an insufferable jackass, a huge dork and some kind of action hero depending on what's going on. His weapon is something that's repeatedly stated a being "unbreakable." Dirk is unyielding and seemingly unbreakable himself, like he's made of steel. He's outwardly so aloof that people would never know all of who he is by looking at him. Even people who know him best had still needed to put him together like a puzzle.
He knows he's cool. He doesn't pretend to be. He thinks he is to the point of having bragging rights about it. He thinks he's basically Batman, highly intelligent and badass. He has absurd hobbies and interests but he owns that he likes what he likes and can have people questioning if there's so many layers of irony that he made something horribly stupid cool. He has a lot of confidence when it comes to most of his abilities. He's a perfectionist and an overachiever, putting far more than 100% into everything he does. He sets the bar ridiculously high for himself and everyone around him, without thinking for a second it's unreachable until much later.
Nothing about Dirk Strider is "half-assed." One can count on him to put a lot of thought and effort into everything. He's either an unstoppable force or a complete disaster, sabotaging himself without knowing how to stop because he has to keep trying to perfect it. Very rarely is there an in-between. The most common middle-ground he's capable of is zoning out completely. He gets utterly distracted while trying to do everything at once and always ends up zoning out on one end to focus on the other. Despite claims and attempts to do so, he's not great at multi-tasking.
It's stated that Dirk has a usual way of getting exactly what he wants. He believes it's expected of him to do it all so he can be controlling and pushy. His method of doing things starts out as being viewed as the best possible method by himself, even if it can be completely insane to the normal person. For example, when teaching one how to fight, he assumes the best method of doing so is ambushing them and relentlessly beating the crap out of them until they land a hit back. His method of teaching someone how to ride a bike would be to put them on the bike and then forcefully shove them down a large hill.
His controlling can turn into playing mind games that border on manipulative. Putting his Auto-Responder on with Jake in order to keep him toes and insisting things are good when questioned. He assumes he is the one in control. He thinks of himself as a puppeteer, in every sense of the word (Holy SHIT does he love puppets). He grew up with puppets and robots both of which he himself are responsible for creating and have never refused an idea from him. The only exception to the rule is The Auto-Responder, who he still assumes to be predictable enough for a long time. Jane is given the title of leader but he assumes he is going to be the one pulling the strings in the background. He doesn't ask if they're okay with his plans or even sharing the details before enacting them. He phrases things as opinions to be considered but they are meant to nudge people into the direction he wants them to go. He assumes he knows what's best for people, knows what they need and where they need to improve. He likes to give his friends advice to aid their personal development by pointing out their flaws and explaining how to fix them, like telling Jake to be more skeptical and telling Jane to be less so.
His friends often have no idea what to make of his actions, assuming it might be part of some grand convoluted scheme they know they can't win. People don't know how to talk to him directly because figuring him out is a challenge. Roxy and Jake both express a fear of failing him, of telling him what they really think. People have a hard time saying 'No.' It's never his intention to be this way.
Dirk has a huge heart. He loves almost unconditionally. He honestly thinks he's being helpful until it becomes clear he's not. His habit of pushing his friends stems from wanting to witness them to succeed. He never gives the thought of day that they're incapable of doing so. He believes in them completely and holds the utmost respect for them, Roxy especially so. He thinks she is far stronger than he'll ever be. He sees her as the only one capable of overcoming her own flaws and the main glue that keeps them (him) together. He feels guilty his love is strictly platonic because he just wants to make her happy. Dirk confesses doesn't think he could ever actually intentionally cause her harm - which would undoubtedly carry over to any of his friends. He can't raise his sword to them, even if it he knew it they would be perfectly fine and it would result in their advancement. He wouldn't want to raise a hand to them either. He even hesitates to destroy his own creations or throw a lifeless puppet away. The thought of having to intentionally hurt terrifies him. He'd rather sacrifice himself than have someone/thing he cares about face pain. In a doomed timeline (resulting from [S] Game Over), realizing his friends are dead and he ultimately failed to do anything about it is the one thing that causes him to completely give up, too overcome with grief. He'd hate to be alone again.
He was alone for sixteen years. Dirk grew up in the middle of a flooded wasteland. The world had been a chaotic environment he could never venture out into. He managed to raise himself somehow. He had to be active and know how to take initiative because the other option was perishing. Without a human culture to dictate the norm, he picks it apart from the past, choosing to emulate the long-dead figure of his "Bro" (His universe's Dave) as much as he can. He's built up the legend in his head. This is his idol, the legacy of which he wishes to live up to and improve upon. He believes having this positive figure helped him become a better person than he would have been otherwise and set the standard for who he wanted to be. Being the overachiever that he is, he takes ironic gestures like interpreted acts of extreme masculinity displayed in archived data about this guy to an extreme. He's hyper-intelligent gay man with but refuses to make his orientation anything more than a footnote in order to act in loving mockery of a bro culture that existed centuries before him. The performance, as he words it, is difficult to break. He's been doing it his entire life. This wall of dudebro irony and stoic expression helps him control his world. It allows him to fit in better with Jake and Jane, who exist at the same time as his idol and don't understand his situation until it's explained to them later on. It also limits how visible his true thoughts and feelings are should he be monitored by the evil alien overlord while simultaneously honoring someone who dedicated his life to giving her a middle finger.
Dirk's only social contact for his time alone had been with people over the internet (only one of which exists in the same time frame and two of which are aliens sharing a body.) After starting the game, he's had a few months with fellow humans. This lack of contact along with his self-imposed emulation of his idol and a constant threat to their lives looming over, have reasonably lead to Dirk having difficulty properly expressing himself and knowing how to act around people. He fails spectacularly at making his first relationship anything but an emotionally draining one for Jake, not initially getting why they shouldn't spend every waking second together among many other issues.
It's joked by his friends that he could be an emotionless robot. He's had to put aside expressing things in order to protect himself and to focus on what needs to be done. Emotions can get in the way of thinking clearly and he thinks a lot. Any displays of affection are extremely difficult to express, even if it's with the person he spent his entire life protecting while she was sleep-floating in their dreams or an actual boyfriend. He won't tell someone how deeply he cares for them outright unless pushed to an extreme, choosing instead of convey it in a way that seems like he's joking or sharing the thought with someone else. He wants people to know what he's thinking and feeling, expects them to see through any ironic or subtle gesture but his cool composure doesn't falter enough to clue people most of the time unless he outright says what's on his mind. He's more or less emotionally unbreakable, like a really disciplined Vulcan. The walls remain firmly up and in place. This is true even while under the influence of Trickster Mode, something that alters inhibitions and has his friends loudly expressing thoughts and desires to eerie smiling extremes claiming it will solve their problems. He's terrified and yells at them but remains visually deadpanned under the influence himself and in control.
Dirk can often play the straight man (pun not intended) to his friends. His reactions to antics can be the equivalent of looking into the camera like he's on The Office. This does not mean he is not occasionally downright ridiculous himself. He's an intellectual and uses endless sarcasm, which displays at times as being an insufferable know-it-all. This is much like Rose Lalonde, technically his daughter, who Roxy comments directly to with "You're Dirk!" upon hearing her speak. He shares a verbose analytical way of talking to people and a habit of getting too long-winded with his writings. There's a similar sense of snarky humors, while he's still capable of going off on tangents and using inappropriate metaphors like Dave. He can be both very terse and very wordy depending on who he's talking to and the current comfort level. This can be demonstrated best while talking to Jake and Jane who have respectively been on the receiving end of getting blunt one-word replies laced with sarcasm and paragraphs of rambling filled with pop-culture and literary references. He's completely game for humorous fun, should nothing to too serious be happening. For instance, Dirk indulges Caliborn's request that he draw smut and the drawings end up including Jake eating a baby and Roxy comparing breasts to an ocean.
While he does act upon the art-form of 'irony,' there is sincerity in every action and he does know when to turn it off and get serious. He's willing to admit when things aren't as perfect as he wants them to be when deemed necessary, even in cases where he might justify the problems later. Dirk doesn't shy away from deep conversation. He goes the deepest when speaking to Jane and later on Dave, people who he feels the most comfortable with. He's completely upfront with Jane right from the start, the conversations being the most telling. He thinks she gets him the most. In a lesser instance, Calliope gets to see past the ironic facade because he goes to her for advice concerning things about the game. He is willing to share and offer genuine opinions, express fears and general thoughts and, perhaps most importantly, listen in order to offer support.
Growing up alone, Dirk has been with his own thoughts for a long time. He is also surrounded by versions of himself, constantly requiring him to look in the mirror and see his own flaws. He externalizes to the point where he often feels he is an outsider looking at himself. After finally being able to interact with people, he becomes more self-aware. He can witness his interactions with people. He does not believe himself to be a good person and is in a constant struggle to avoid being a worse one. His own worst enemy is himself, metaphorically and literally. This is made abundantly clear with how to reacts to the Auto Responder, an artificial intelligence that started out as a copy of his thirteen-year-old self's brain. Dirk allows him to pretend to be him and talk to his friends until he realizes his behavior is something he doesn't like, which of course, the AR points out is the same behavior Dirk would be having in the same situation. The AR is rude to him and he does it back because this is how he thinks he should be treated on a level.
His low opinions of himself leads to a distrust in others, at least when expressing opinions about him. He fears that sharing his deep respect and love would overwhelm Roxy, when in actuality it would be the other way around. It would overwhelm him to hear praise. Compliments may be dismissed because is not reaching his own personal standards and doesn't like what he sees. He thinks he knows best and what he knows is the he's the worst. He holds remorse for everything he does and everything every version of him does. While he owns up to what he does and says, he isn't sure how to approach fixing problematic areas without an act of self-destruction. He almost destroys AR but can't bring himself to do it.
He puts himself under a lot of stress. Dirk stated he does not sleep, trying to be alert at all times. He likely doesn't sleep much once he lacks a dream-self that allows a constant state of being awake. His life required him to be on guard and never learned how not to be. He more or less skipped childhood and assumed he had to take the position of main protector for the group like he had always been for himself. He idealizes his friends and genuinely feels he has to help them. This is the role he thinks he is best at and doesn't know what other purpose he might serve for them outside of it. He doesn't want anyone to see him fail because failure would mean a loss of purpose and thus a loss of self. The complete loss of control is the worst fear for him so he does what he can to keep it and remain functional. He keeps trying even if things are completely out of his hands. Dirk can't back down completely lest he completely shatter to pieces.
He's getting better at picking pieces back up. Very slowly. It starts with Dave, someone who isn't his idol but he thinks might be even better. Dirk gave up control for once and stopped being unbreakable.